Tuesday, July 9, 2013

STUFF

So, here I am, sitting on the train on my way to Los Angeles from our new home in a sleepy little beach community about 40 miles north of the city. It Really is sleepy, too. For a while I thought there were lots of homeless people there...but it turns out the sea breeze just makes you sleepy. I have struggled to stay awake just walking to my car. I have fallen asleep in the checkout line at the market. I have dozed mightily watering the plants. I am not quite sure how anyone gets anything done in our town, but I have noticed most everyone carries around a large can of Red Bull. The priest at our new parish takes huge swigs of the stuff between words during his homily. The crime rate here is incredibly low, too. We have a lot of criminals, but they nod off when they're being chased by police officers who wear special breathing masks that provide a continuous supply of non-beach city air. Half of our home is still under construction and has been for 43 years. The carpenters can only manage to drive one nail an hour.

By the way, a bear just tried to attack our train.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll eventually adapt to the slower pace of our new town. Okay...now the bear is running toward the back of the train. We slowed down a little and he almost got on and then the conductor went a little faster and the bear missed. Everyone is laughing. I guess they do this a lot. Okay, I just checked with the person sitting next to me. He tells me it's called bear-baiting. We just slowed down again and just as the bear almost climbed on the back we sped up again. Everyone is laughing again. I don't know. I think it's kind of mean. Oh we'll, I guess what Marvin Hamlish said was right; 'We're all different."

Not that you asked, but I've come to the conclusion that moving stinks. We Ruggs tend to stay in one place for a long while. So moving 20 years of stuff hasn't been very pleasurable. It's been icky. The last time I moved I was young and stupid. I did what all young, stupid people do when they move...get their friends to help. Now, 20 years older, I never got the memo that people my age hire people to move. It never occurred to me that people will actually put all your stuff in a truck and drive it to the new place, unpack it and then leave. I only realized this as I drove the UHaul truck back to the rental place after a day of lugging heavy furniture up endless flights of stairs with my saintly brother-in-law. I have promised myself that if we ever move again, I'm going all out. I'm going to hire the most expensive movers I can find and sip wine with friends as they go about moving everything. Wait a second...looks like the train slowed down a little too much. Great. Now there's a bear on board.