Whenever I speak at universities or car factories, the same question is invariably asked of me: "How do you get a network to buy an idea for an animated series?"
I always answer this question differently and try make it as confusing as possible.
You see, the television animation business is a crowded place. And I'll do anything I can to get a leg up on the competition. The last thing I want is some snot-nosed, animation school graduate to muscle in on my turf with his or her fresh ideas and newfangled characters. I have a family to feed. I have a dog missing a foot. While this isn't expensive now, it could be. The government might pass a law requiring me to make my dog "whole" by giving him a new foot. That probably won't be cheap. And I have to be ready. There's probably a lot of blood work and grafting and gross stuff. Gross stuff costs a pretty peeny. (You probably think I made a mistake there and meant to write 'penny'. I didn't. A peeny is a new form of currency my neighbor is developing. I've seen it and it's real.)
So, yeah. I say a lot of confusing stuff to throw potential animation writers off the trail.
But I'll tell you Froynlaven readers the truth. After all, some of you are paying close to 100 dollars a month to subscribe to this blog, so I think I owe it to you. (If you are not currently paying close to 100 dollars a month to subscribe to this blog, would you take a moment to consider it? Please? I already told you about my dog, right? What if I threw in a tote bag?)
So here's the straight scoop: networks buy ideas that are good. The gooder the better. Sometimes they buy mediocre ideas in the hope of making them good. And a lot of times they buy good ideas and make them mediocre. But generally they are looking for a good idea. That's the secret. And now you know. Good ideas. That's what the networks want.
And it just so happens I have five good ideas that I'm toying with right now. These are really good. Pitch season is coming up and I'm really trying to narrow any of these five good ideas down to the one good idea I'm going to pitch. I thought maybe...maybe you all wouldn't mind giving them a read and letting me know which you think is the goodest of the best. I know I'm taking a bit of a risk by putting my best stuff out there. But, I trust you all. You're paying 100 bucks a month. Why wouldn't I trust you.
So, okay. Here are the five ideas. Just lemme know which one is your favorite. Okay? Thanks. (Some of these I have titles for. Some I don't.)
1. Untitled Horse Project. There are these horses and they talk and junk. And there's one horse who is sarcastic. And sometimes he gets in over his head and junk happens.
2. Untitled Bee Project. There are these bees and they all talk and junk. And there's one bee who is sarcastic. And sometimes he gets in over his head and junk happens.
3. Possum Boy. There are these possums and they all talk and junk. And there's one possum (Possum Boy) who is sarcastic. And sometimes he gets in over his head and junk happens.
4. Mighty Diatoms. There are these diatoms and they all talk and junk. And there's one diatom who is sarcastic. And sometimes he gets in over his head and junk happens.
5. Untitled Project. I haven't figured this one out entirely.
Please don't steal any of these! But let me know your favorite.
Untitled Project is my favorite. Why? BECAUSE THE OTHER FOUR ARE THE SAME THING! ROOOAAAAAR! You should just combine them all! A horse, a bee, a possum and a diatom. The horse can call everyone Wilbur, the bee can be voiced by Wayne Knight, Possum Boy can be Adam West and the Diatom can be a sarcastic Bill Murray. Set it on an island or in space. Or an island in space. And the name of the show can really be Untitled Project. Genius! Yes, I'm available to be your assistant.
ReplyDeleteI admire the diversity of your ideas!
ReplyDeleteJust as Josh, I'd stick with No. 5 though.
It sounds the most interesting and promising, just imagine the possibilities!
No.5 is good, but the real money maker is clearly no. 4
ReplyDeleteI like the one with the junk.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad everyone is digging #5. I really think there's something there.
ReplyDelete#5 has already been done. It was called "The Wacky World of Tex Avery" and its producers never figured out entirely what it was either.
ReplyDeleteI would suggest a mash-up of #1-4: The Mighty Diatomatic Horse Bee Boy. No one has pitched anything like that... except maybe a DiC producer.
I think #1 has been done, 'cept the horses are female, and younger.
ReplyDeleteI like that Idea of the subatomic particles running around, just be carefull...if two of the wrong kind get into a scrap,...they could end up blowing up the planet, if not the universe.
Possum, horse and bee cute together+ as star like Hansel. gotta love that boy..
ReplyDelete